In Part 2 of our powerful conversation with Lisa MM Butler, we go deeper into what happens after the DNA tests, after the reunions, and after the losses. Lisa, an outspoken transracial adoptee, writer, illustrator, and library worker, shares how the death of her adoptive parents left her grappling with the question: Whose family am I part of now?
Lisa takes us inside her inner world of healing, through art, graphic memoirs, and workshops created by and for adoptees. We talk about chosen family, sibling distance, and what trust looks like when it’s been broken again and again. She also dives into the dangerous realities of international adoptees facing deportation, institutional erasure of Black history, and how reproductive control intersects with the adoption industry.
This episode is raw, nuanced, and filled with moments that will stick with you long after you hit stop. Lisa reminds us that art can hold grief, community can build safety, and sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is say it out loud.
What Happens When a Transracial Adoptee Tells the Whole Truth?
“After my adoptive parents died, I had to decide, what does ‘family’ even mean now? And do I still belong?”
🧬 Featured Guest: Lisa MM Butler
Lisa MM Butler is a transracial adoptee, writer, illustrator, library worker, and advocate. Born and raised in Wyoming, Lisa was adopted out of foster care after being relinquished by her white mother due to her Black heritage. She is in reunion with members of her biological father’s family, though both birth parents have declined to meet her.
Lisa is a board member of VOICES: A BIPOC Adoptee Community, a grassroots nonprofit dedicated to supporting BIPOC adoptees through healing-centered programming, creative expression, and collective care. Her work focuses on amplifying adoptee voices through children’s literature, zines, graphic memoirs, and community workshops. Her passion lies in using storytelling as a tool for processing trauma, building identity, and making sure no adoptee feels alone in the fog.
Learn more about her work at: www.bipocadoptees.org
🔑 Topics Covered in This Episode:
- 🖼️ Reconstructing identity through art, illustration, and clown archetypes
- 📚 The lack of accurate children’s books from adoptee perspectives—and how Lisa’s changing that
- 🎨 Graphic memoirs, zines, and the role of creativity in processing trauma
- 🧠 Trust, attachment, and the slow work of letting people in
- 💔 Sibling disconnection and grief after the death of adoptive parents
- 🏠 Chosen family vs. biological or legal family—what connection actually means
- 🌎 Intercountry adoption and the terrifying reality of adoptees facing deportation due to lack of naturalization
- South Korea’s admission of systemic child trafficking in international adoption
- ⚖️ Reproductive control, Freedom Farms, and the ethics of forced family separation
- 🎶 Soul music and R&B as healing modalities
- 🧩 The adoptee experience as uniquely powerful—and widely relatable
🛠️ Resources & Mentions:
- VOICES: A BIPOC Adoptee Community – www.bipocadoptees.org
- Adoptees for Justice – www.adopteesforjustice.org
- Adoptees United – www.adopteesunited.org
- Samm Henshaw – Soul/R&B